New Beginnings...

A week ago, I found myself awake at 6 am and everyone else was asleep. Ahhh, I thought, I should get up and do some writing. And, of course, five minutes later a boy was awake and needing something from me. So much for that, I thought, maybe tomorrow. I had some vague thought that writing would make a great New Year's resolution and, surely, in January it will all work better.

But here's the thing, nothing in my life will just work anymore. I have 4 young children, all of them busy boys, and if I keep waiting for the right time to come, I'll never write another word. My aunt said years ago that the goal should be to write something every day, it didn't need to be profound, it just needed to be. I've reminded myself of this endlessly, perhaps it is time to actually act on it? I'm not even sure on what I'm waiting anymore. The baby is sleeping through the night, so sleep is as much mine as it can be at this stage of my life. The move is complete, or as complete as they get. The boys are in school. My life is certainly not going to get less complicated than it is now.

I do find myself wondering what it is that I have to say that is important enough to put on paper and have others read, realizing that the answer to that question is quite likely, nothing. But then, most people who write don't do it for others. While everyone would love to find an audience that appreciates their words and heaps praise on them, if you ask them most people would say that they write for themselves, not for anyone else. It's true for me. I started this blog when we were trying to sort out life after CJ was diagnosed with a learning disability. I did send the link to family so they could keep track of our journey, but the point wasn't whether anyone else ever saw it, much less read it. The point was always that it helped me to make sense of what was happening around us. So maybe I don't need a theme or an angle, maybe I just need to write about whatever I'm trying to understand on any given day. Some days it might be a topic others care about, some days I might be the only one who bothers to read it.

Nonetheless, read it you can, starting today and every day. I can't guarantee more than a sentence, but there will be something to see if you care enough to check.